EmekaTalks

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Priceless habits that will turn your relationships around

 

photo credit: linkedin.com

photo credit: linkedin.com

 

The past few days have been particularly wet. Though it isn’t surprising to me – everyone (In Nigeria) knows July is always this way. In fact the weather app on my smart phone has played me twice in the past few days, it says thunderstorms and I actually get to see ‘thunder rain’.

Any time I’m about to write a post on relationships, I’m a bit cautious not to over exaggerate or at least not to sound too cliché.  But the feeling now is poles apart.  I’ll tell you the reason.

I had just finished shopping – marching out with stuffed fancy bags in slow motion out of the shopping mall (Well, not really. I actually went to window shop buy a 16GB SD card) when I saw a really cute scene.It was still raining heavily, when an elderly couple pulled up just in front of the mall. The man got out of the car, walked around to the passenger side, opened the door for the woman, shot open an umbrella to cover her, took her hand, helped her out of her sit and slowly guided her into the mall. (Absorbing most of the showers) It was such a lovely moment to witness.
As I opened my laptop to write, that couple came to mind, And I thought, if we all cultured certain habits in our relationships with others, maybe, just maybe bokoharam will stop bombing the world will be a better place… Think about it. Habits like:

Spending quality time together… There are few joys in life that equal a good conversation, a genuine laugh, shared by people who care about each other… Choose to be around these people and choose to make the most of your time together.

Paying genuine attention… Knowing that your presence means something to someone is a wonderful feeling. In our relationships with others, nothing we give is more appreciated than our sincere and focused attention. Your friends and family are too beautiful to ignore, so give them the gift of your time, undivided attention and kindness.

Expressing our sincere appreciation for loved ones… No matter how sure you are of someone’s admiration and appreciation, it’s always nice to be reminded of it. So if you appreciate someone today, let them know. Just because they are reliable and always there when you need them doesn’t mean you should fail to appreciate them regularly.

Taking responsibility for wrong doings… Apologize sincerely when you know you should. An apology is actually the super glue of lasting relationships. Never ruin an apology with an excuse. Excuses are not apologies! If you know your words or actions have hurt someone you care about, admit your faults and face the reality of your actions.

Solving issues together and not with others…These days people negatively about their loved ones on social media. Linda Ikeji and a host of other blogs are flooded regularly with such destructive vibes – from respected celebrities to politicians to regular people. It’s really an immature way to get attention. Don’t fall into the trap of getting other people on your side because healthy relationships only have one side. Don’t let outsiders run your relationships for you. If you have issues with someone, work it out with them, not over the internet! Wayne Dyer once wrote that ‘problems occur in relationships because each person is concentrating on what is missing in the other person.’

 

What habits have helped you strengthen your relationships? Share with us!

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5 Responses

  1. Okebie Joan says

    Ok, noted. Funny but nice

  2. livelytwist says

    I pictured the scene of the couple in the rain in my mind, lovely!
    All the tips you gave are great. I’ll add forgiveness, which in my view, is the currency of great friendships. But I see this theme embedded in the last two tips.

    • Emeka says

      Lovely scene that is! Forgiveness fits in really nicely as well :)

  3. Mr. D says

    Emeka this is a good and helpful write up.

    • Emeka says

      Thanks Mr D

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